Families, Yours, Mine and Ours

My son Tony, me & Grandson Bobby

My son Tony, daughter-in law Heather and grandkids Owen and Emma (and Emma's purse)

Since the summer here is so warm and pleasant, I been going to the park almost every evening with my friend from the wedding palace. We talk about a lot of things and last night we started to talk about family. She spoke about her parents, living in the village during the soviet times, her parents making sure her whole family stayed together.  Her aunts, uncles, she grew up with all of her cousins in this village house. Her mother was a Chemist, graduating from the university in Baku, but her most important job was her family. She died three years ago and it is still hard for Esmira to talk about her mother.  Her father is an structural engineer (that's why no cracks or problems with the foundations of their homes and office buildings/wedding palace during the earthquakes!!).  He provides for the whole family then and now.  "It was difficult times during the Soviet Union but my father never lied, stole or cheated anyone," said Esmira.  She told me about an even scarier time when the Soviet Union dissolved (which led to ethnic disputes) and no one knew what was going to happen. There were many groups (they are Sunni, peaceful Muslims) but "we didn't know which facet if any was going to come in and destroy us". "I chose to have one child" she said because if I needed to run and leave this country, I could carry that one child.  Times are better now, my family lives in Baku, England, Denmark and Spain, but we are still very close.  Though her mother is gone, her father is still a very important part of their business and family (the anchor). The love she had when she talked about her sisters, brother, cousins, aunts, uncle, husband and daughter was amazing.  Going home I reflected on the hardships that these people face during the communist and after times, unlike us Americans who always had the freedoms but the difference with them was the importance of holding the family together through all kinds of adversary touched my heart.  I wish that I could say the same for me.  We as Americans feel that the need to make as much money as we can is the best for our family, but here, that is not the priority.  I do see this changing with my son and daughter-in-law with my grandchildren.  Heather is a stay at home mom and her priority is the children and family.  My daughter-in-law goes out of her way to include her whole family (and mine) and makes a point of visiting the family and exposing my grandchildren to all of their relatives.  I might have missed the mark in the family thing, but I see that the brokenness is being repaired by my son and (mostly) by my daughter-in-law.  So I guess there is hope for us Americans!!

Life Challenge: Love is the greatest miracle cure. Loving ourselves and others works miracles in our lives... Louise Hay